13. Sacrifice

The world was collapsing. Great rifts appeared in the sky. Astronomers reported the worrying fact that these rifts seemed to stretch on out inter interstellar space. Some tried to posit that this was just a trick of weather, or a new galactic phenomena that should not be feared neccessarily but the tears in the fabric of the universe were visible even at night, the frayed edges glimmering slightly but more worryingly, the gaping maw between even blacker then the blackness of space. Humanity had found a new template for fear.

Of course, the blame game started. Some blamed aliens. Some blamed technology. Some blamed religious people for not praying enough or eating pork or giving women the vote. The debates raged on underneath as above the fragmentation of the sky worsened. As more fractures appeared, most religious people united to blame the gays. It had always been the gays.

The gays responded with "We couldn't tear any kind of fabric," then added that with enough rainbows, the sky might not fragment. Indeed, it seemed that the more gays were allowed to fornicate openly and have fabulous parties in the open air, the slower the fragmenting seemed. However it didn't stop it entirely.

A secret enclave gathered in a secret location. So secret that even heads of state were not aware. The only ones invited where the most respected theologians and philosophers. Religious leaders from all backgrounds were flown in. Only a handful of scientists were invited, some physicist and a mathematician.

Instantly there was a chaotic scene right in the richly carpeted room where the meeting was supposed to be held. Religious leaders started attacking each other, accusing each other of improper faith, or apostasy or blasphemy or heresy. The shouting became unbearable and the scientists withdrew outside till it was over while the buddhists shook their heads.

When voices grew thin and reedy the shouting thinned and a small men with grey hair finally stood and called for attention. "We've gathered here... NOT to air out differences, but find similarities. It is upon our venerable shoulders, gentlemen, that we find a solution to our great problem." The hum in the room receded to a stony silence. "The end of the world is nigh, we must find out why our God is so displeased with us."

Instantly the evangelicals and a handful of cult leaders stood and chanted that this was heresy. If God wanted the world to end then so be it. They would be saved. Each argued against the other, insisting that only THEY were the chosen ones and continued to do so as they walked out.

In the silence after they left, a calmer more rational debate followed. The scientists were asked for their opinions, politely listened to then breezily ignored afterwards. The buddhists were preaching for calm acceptence of the inevitable. Mormons felt that everyone should marry multiple wives to stop the cracking of the sky. Rabbis debated with each other on the possibility that this was either a plague of sorts or a great tribulation to be endured.

They great texts were read, re-read and poured over. Hours passed where they tried to find answers in the ancient texts. In the meantime, the scientists played scrabble and solitaire, bored at the proceedings and wondering if their colleagues had discovered some new element to their galactic troubles.

Finally a grey old bishop and an Rabbi and an Mullah seemed to come to an agreement. They had found a common ground. They had discovered a repeating vein in many of their texts. A theme of sacrifice for attonement. They discussed it at length and came to the conclusion that perhaps God needed a sacrifice.

The Buddhists left first in a silent procession of grim silence. Violence was not their creed. The scientists left next in loud noisy outrage. The mathematician stayed out of sheer morbid curiosity however and listened as the theologians and philosophers debated. Several philosophers would leave as well as a handful of theologians. Two bishops tried to leave then ran back in, deathly pale reporting that a giant rift had appeared right above them. This only spurred the discussions towards the inevitable. They would find a suitable sacrifice and offer it up to God. If it worked, then they would save the world! If not, then well at least they tried.

Who the sacrifice would be was discussed. It was unanimous that the their sacrifice should be a girl and a virgin but they were divided on exactly which religious background she should be from. Some argued that she should be pretty, others that she should not be too young. Some suggested sacrificing one from each "Just in case, God wanted a selection." Luckily this idea was ignored. Everyone agreed that she should not be atheist. They only went to hell. It would be a sacrifice to the Devil, not to God.

Suddenly great noises were heard outside. A glance behind the door revealed that the rift above them was widening. New tears were forming and worse, seemed to be spreading down to the ground which heaved and shuddered.

There was a new urgency. They were running out of time. It was agreed that a sacrifice was needed. Now. There was just one problem, they were miles away from any town. There was no time to go find a virginal woman and bring her back.

"Lets sacrifice any woman!" someone cried.

Everyone looked around. There was no woman among them. Not even among their retinue. Not a single one had been invited. Fear gripped them until they spotted him. A lone boy standing beside a bishop in a choirboy robe.

He was a beautiful boy with wide innocent eyes, pale hair and the milky smooth skin of youth. He had stood quietly, close to the bloated mass of flesh that even now was slowly stroking that smooth head of tussled hair.

There was an uneasy murmer thrumming through the room, then someone said, "what about him?"

The boy seemed not to understand but the bishop behind him was nervous. "he's my pageboy, my uh... assistant," he insisted.

"Is he a virgin?" someone asked.

The bishop looked nervous, eyes darting here and there.

"Is he?" someone else insisted, this time with an edge in their voice.

"Uh.. yes.. of course.... he is... uh... only nine." The bishop was visibly sweating, his hands firmly behind him.

The murmer then grew more insistent. Some were not comfortable with the idea of sacrificing a boy, but what other choice did they have? They faced the boy, who now seemed to realise the danger he was in. When they began to close in, the boy fled.

Around the room he darted, sliding under legs and knocking fat ungainly priests and Rabbis out of the way. Unfortunately someone had had the forsight to lock the door and it wasn't long before the boy was caught, wriggling and writhing and biting.

A table was brought out and the boy laid out and firmly held in place. Then another problem. "how will we do it?"

"We should cut his throat. God clearly needs to see blood."

"No, strangle him, that will be enough."

"No we must do the proper rituals then behead him." The debates continued. They settled on throat slicing till they realised that they had brought no knife or sword.

"Fine, throttle him with a cord." Then another debate on what cord or rope to use exactly.

Finally, they were ready. Prayers were offered while others chanted. If anyone felt a smidgen of guilt, he suppressed it. If anyone was secretly thrilled, they hid that too. The little boy, wriggled and kicked, not entirely understanding what was too happen, he was just a small italian orphan with little schooling, but he did know that being held down was not a good sign. He'd been with his bishop long enough to know, men in robes were not to be trusted.

The rope was raised, the chanting grew louder and just as it grew to a crescendo, the doors burst open and a strong and very hot gust of wind blew in. Hair and clothese were scorched slightly but there was no one at the door except a voice.

"What on Heaven and Earth do you think you are doing?!" cried the great booming voice. It sounded neither male nore female but something in between. It was definitely not human. It had to be God.

"We... are... trying to apease you lord." whimpered a Bishop.

"Through Murder? Dear me, when I created you, I really must have been stingy with intelligence. Thousands of years of development and evolution and this is all you can imagine in a time of crisis?" The booming voice was decidedly peeved.

"But... But, we read your texts.. we ... thought this was what you wanted," said a Rabbi prostrate on the floor.

"They were supposed to be allegorical. Metaphorical even. Not literal. You'd think you'd get that from the language used." The voice sighed, "I knew I should have let the lot of you drown before this."

"But then... what is it you want oh Lord of all? Why are you destroying our world?"

"Who said I'm destroying. Look at you whimpering like a bunch of feckless idiots. I'm trying to remind you of something you all seem to have forgotten!"

"Please tell us!" cried a Mullah loudly, looking firmly at the ground.

"God, what would the point in that be. I dont give out answers that easy." The voice became irritated, "What am i saying, my most backwardly evolved creation, apperently i do have to spoonfeed you everything."

"We evolved?! cried a Creationist priest who had been hiding in the back.

"Course you evolved, you pillock," snapped the voice. "You think i put dinosaur bones in the ground to fuck with your heads? What do you take me for? Some arsehole?!"

"What was thine lesson for us, please... tell us!" asked a Mullah reverently.

"To live each day as if it is your last. Why do you think I went with the tearing and ripping. I could have just willed you all out of existence."

"But.. how?!" cried the Mullah.

"With love, compassion and curiosity, oh for fucks sake. Screw the lot of you. I should have known you guys weren't worth my time when you started hacking bits off of your children in my name. You know what? I'm going to concentrate on my other planets. You guys are on your own." The voice was waspish.

"We are not your only creations?!" Cried the former Creationist.

"You guys really are arrogant tossers aren't you? Think you are the centre of the world. Well good luck with that. And let that boy go!" The boy was released instantly and he sat up and hopped off the table. "And seriously, you might wanna spend more time thinking about the wolves in your midst. Like that bishop over there. Stop fiddlng with children. Do i HAVE to spell out EVERYTHING?! you guys are like the universal equivalent of special needs kids. This wouldn't have happened if i left women in charge. Stupid me for thinking they had so much to deal with already I shouldn't give them more work... " With that the voice faded. Gust of air blew the other way and it became evident that God was no longer with them.

The emptiness that he left behind was just too much. Many were openly weeping, tearing at their hair, grieving for the smug confidence that they had no lost. Some ambled away through the door to begin their search for a new way of life. Some stood catatonic.

The little boy went to his bishop and kicked him squarely in the shin, smiling when the bishop began to cry. He then walked out the doors and looked up. The rifts were gone. No hint remained of what had been so evident just a few minutes before. All seemed to remain was an exasperated sigh lingering in the air.